Night 4

Okay, so the nightly updates didn't happen. Most of this week, I was too tired after coming home from work to blog, nor do anything productive.

Still good on the promise. Though I really haven't done anything to put myself in a position to break it. Part of me says, "good for you to not tempt fate." The other part says, "wimp...of course you'll be able to keep it if you're cooped up at home all day and night." Which part to believe? I don't know.

So I plan to try something out tonight. I'm going out. Gonna call a buddy of mine (one of the friends I mentioned in my first post) and see what's going on.

Usually these nights out usually involve a few pitchers at the neighborhood pool hall, checking out the women that are in attendance, watching sports/Sportscenter, and talking about anything that strikes our collective fancies. Which is usually followed by my going home and pleasuring myself. Tonight should probably be no different, except for that last part, of course.

So something has come up in my mind that I need to air out here...Lenten Sundays. Namely, the Sunday exemption.

I heard a few years ago about the practice of enjoying the thing that a person is giving up during Lent. Something about there being more than the original 40 days now, but when Sundays are excluded, the number of days in Lent equals forty. But I heard a priest say once about this, "It's not like when Jesus was in the desert for forty days, he left the desert once a week."

I bring this up because I'm visiting my ex-girlfriend tomorrow. Things have been interesting between us lately (I swear I'll explain in a later post). But after some intimate moments during the past few weeks, she pretty much believes that we're back together. She wanted me to visit her this weekend before I start my regular weekend shift at my job. I said that I wasn't able to go today (I was, but I didn't tell her that) but I did tell her that I'd meet with her for lunch tomorrow. For the record, she lives in a town an hour away from mine.

Thing is, I have yet to tell her about this sacrifice. Part of the reason that I came up with this is to try and figure out what my exact feelings are for this woman. We've known each other for over two years now. Went from friends to lovers and back again many times within that period. But here's hoping I can stick to my plan. (I'll try and be in public places for as long as I possibly can....)

Wish me luck.

Night 1 - Ash Wednesday

So far, so good.

Didn't really run into any problems today (save for an incident at work which involved porn). Went to Mass today to get my ashes, and really started to tune in for my Lenten journey.

One thing that got to me though was during the readings. During the Gospel in which it is said to not make fasting, praying and almsgiving a public thing, I started to wonder about having this blog of my abstinence in the first place. But it has just hit me. This is not public. No one reading this knows the identity of the author, except for the personal friends I have told. Unless Blogger makes it a "Blog of Note," or someone out in Internet-land makes a big deal about it, this will just be another blog for people to decided whether or not to read.

There's my two cents for the night. I'll have more tomorrow.

Night 0 - Fat Tuesday

Two hours before Lent.

And I sit facing a great challenge.

Like most Catholics, I'm attempting to give something up for Lent (the period running from Ash Wednesday to Easter Sunday). I've thought a bit about what I did want to give up. Something simple, like soda or sugar. A distraction, like TV or radio. But then I figured out what really has been getting in the way of me being a better Catholic/Christian.

Sex.

In the past few years, sex has seemed to be too big a part of my life. Relationships have been damaged because of it, and I've been too caught up in the pursuit of sex. So now I aim to do something about it.

After seeing the comedy "40 Days And 40 Nights", I thought that such a task would be nearly impossible to pull off in real life. But I'm going to try.

No sex whatsoever during Lent. No sex or physical play with anyone. No overly initmate kissing. No petting. (Staying at first base, so to speak...) And no masturbation.

Combine this with a group of friends who talk about sex often, a semi-ex-girlfriend who enjoys seeing me as frequently as possible, a number of friends with benefits, and a currently raging urge to hook up... well, who said Lent was supposed to be easy?

I pledge to update this blog once nightly with my progress. I'll fill in details as needed. I'll add a commenting system for anyone who wants to chime in. And I'll try to focus my energies into something more positive.

But now, time to ring out Mardi Gras....